Sleep

Im beginning to wonder if Im suppose to sleep. Woke up at 1am this morning choking. My nightmare was soo real I couldnt breath. Maybe it was fear or maybe it was real. Im soo tired of nightmares. I lay there crying with my sweetie holding me telling me its ok and not to cry. Not wanting to keep him up I go into the living room and watch a car show. I finally passout on the sofa around 3. Wake up at 4:30 and climb back into bed only to lay there wishing I could shoot myself. I have awful leg aches and of course this morning I had to have one that reduced me to even more tears. My sweetie gets up and gets me some tylenol. I finally fall back to sleep around 5:30. I wake up at 6:40. Bad very bad. I have to be at work at 7 and its a 15 minute drive. Jump in shower run out the door sweetie saying "wait till after the fire department before you let lose." There went my trying to drive better. I have got to learn where these nightmares are coming from. I know I wasnt upset when I went to sleep. I was hot as hell about set the bed on fire. I just want to sleep one whole night. Maybe tonight I will maybe I wont one never knows.